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North Central South Dakota Polytechnic Institute (Norcentral for short) in Mobridge, South Dakota, is the nation’s premier football mill developing a legacy of athletic and academic achievements. The Centre for Perpetual Motion, the Academy of Overly Complicated Mechanical Processes, the School of Reinvention, the Institute of Business Ethics and the School of Chrysopoeial Engineering form the core of the Institute’s varied academic offerings.  Actually, that’s about all we have for academic offerings.

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Plovers Skate By Huskers

Mobridge, SD (AP) — Strange things were happening at John Reid Field at Cold War Memorial Stadium Saturday night as the North Central South Dakota Polytechnic Institute (Norcentral) Freaking Plovers sauntered past the Nebraska Cornhuskers by a score of 26-0.

Norcentral’s Head Football Coach and Chancellor (for life), Gomer S. Blake is known to occasionally show signs of lunacy. But Saturday he out did himself.

After Norcentral’s second touchdown of the game, Blake surprisingly benched the starting offense. Making matters more confusing, the starting defense did not return from the locker room after halftime. Plover reserves finished the game.

Senior kicker Brian Todd has been a frequent visitor to Blake’s dog house because of his inconsistency in making extra point conversions. After Todd missed yet another extra point in the first half, Blake called upon him for field goals twice. The juco transfer from Dodge City, KS, delivered with boots of 44 and 42 yards.

The Plovers strike in the first quarter.

Box Score 1st 2nd 3rd 4th Final
Huskers 0 0 0 0 0
Plovers 14 9 0 3 26
How They Scored:
1st  Quarter 4:14 TD Plovers: K. Powell 52 yd pass from J. Richardson (B. Todd kick)
1:58 TD Plovers: K. McDonald 3 yd run (B. Todd kick)
2nd Quarter 4:37 TD Plovers: M. Weddle 14 yd pass from D. Tyson (Kick failed)
0:13 FG Plovers: B. Todd 44 yds
3rd Quarter None
4th Quarter 4:28 FG Plovers: B. Todd 42 yds
Huskers Stats: Plovers
6 First Downs 13
91 Total Offense 325
16-(-4)-0 Rushes-Yds-TD 30-195-1
10-12-0 Comp-Att-TD 6-10-2
95 Passing Yards 130
1-6 3rd Down Conv 4-7
0-1 4th Down Conv 0-1
0-0-0 Red Zone-TD-FG 2-2-0
0 Fumbles Lost 0
0 Intercepted 0
4-44 Punts-Avg 0-0
1-5 Penalties-yds 1-5
8:50 T.O.P 11:10

During Blake’s post-game interview, the press corps was totally confused.

“I don’t understand what you guys are talking about. Let’s win!”, he bellowed. “We won that game 41-7 in a blinding snow storm! Let’s win! You are all moonatics. Let’s win!”

He then showed us the following graphics.

Anyway, the Plovers host the Texas Longhorns next week, we think.

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Plovers Ease By Ducks

Eugene, OR (AP) — The North Central South Dakota Polytechnic Institute Freaking Plovers turned three quarters of a thriller into a musical comedy in the fourth, cruising by the Oregon Ducks 42-17 before 53,999 fans at Autzen Stadium.

The Plovers won the opening coin flip and as usual Head Football Coach and Chancellor (for life), Gomer S. Blake opted to receive the opening kickoff. The subsequent Plover drive stalled at the Oregon 12-yard line with a 4th and 8. In a rare decision, Blake called for the field goal team. The short kick sailed right, and the Ducks took control.

Oregon struck quickly. Quarterback Lamar Wilson hit flanker David Van for an 88-yard touchdown strike. Suddenly the Plovers trailed on the scoreboard for the first time since last season’s loss to USC, casting an impending sense of doom over Plover Nation.

Ducks Score on 88 Yard Pass in the 1st Quarter

The game entered the 4th quarter, the outcome still undecided with the Plovers having a 21-17 advantage when Plover Magic happened.

Capitalizing on two Duck turnovers, the rout was on with the Plovers ringing up 21 unanswered points. The last tally was struck by Plover reserve players in for first team seniors.

During his post-game press conference, Blake provided some, but not a lot of insight into the game.

“Even though the numbers may not show it, I think our defense played OK. Let’s win!”, he bellowed. “They hurt us early with some deep passes but those worked only because we were just a runt hair late on our pass rush getting to their quarterback. It got better later. Let’s win! We had some trouble adjudicating to their up tempo, no huddle horseplay. Let’s win!”

Next week, the Plovers return home to host the Nebraska Cornhuskers.  The first dozen or so fans entering John Reid Field at Cold War Memorial Stadium will receive a free Coach Gomer Bobbleheads

Box Score 1st 2nd 3rd 4th Final
Plovers 7 14 0 21 42
Ducks 7 10 0 0 17
How They Scored:
1st  Quarter 1:06 TD Ducks: L. Wilson 88 yd pass from D. Van (T. Bain kick)
0:42 TD Plovers: J. Burch 59 yd pass from J. Richardson (B.Todd kick)
2nd Quarter 4:13 TD Plovers: K. Powell 31 yd pass from J. Richardson (B. Todd kick)
2:42 FG Ducks: T. Bain 31 yd
1:55 TD Plovers: K. Powell 60 yd pass from J. Richardson (B. Todd kick)
0:08 TD Ducks: T. Davis 38 yd pass from J. Newsome (T. Bain kick)
3rd Quarter None
4th Quarter 4:55 TD Plovers: G. Williams 17 yd pass from J. Richardson (B.Todd kick)
2:07 TD Plovers: L. Cook 3 yd run (Kick failed)
0:53 TD Plovers: K. Benson 19 yd pass from D. Tyson (2-pt)
Plovers Stats: Ducks
15 First Downs 17
483 Total Offense 318
27-182-1 Rushes-Yds-TD 13-(-35)-0
11-14-5 Comp-Att-TD 19-24-2
301 Passing Yards 353
4-6 3rd Down Conv 3-7
1-1 4th Down Conv 1-1
4-3-0 Red Zone-TD-FG 0-0-0
0 Fumbles Lost 1
0 Intercepted 1
0-0 Punts-Avg 2-36
12:01 T.O.P 7:59
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